Best “Side Hustle” Award: Prison Guard + Masseuse

samfloy~2 March 2018 /Personal

Last Saturday I encountered one of the best side hustle combinations I’ve come across so far in Kenya.

As has probably mentioned before, almost everyone has something else they do on the side to earn a bit extra.

Benjamin (pic below) is a Prison Guard by day and gives massages in his spare time. I was on the receiving end of the latter last week.

The situation itself was erring on the side of ridiculous. After getting a knee twinge in the morning I was advised by a fellow runner to get it looked at properly.

I called him later and he said to “Come to Nairobi Prison and I’ll see you there”.

Getting in the Uber I asked to go to the prison (making the inevitable joke that a police car would be cheaper) and after getting to the gate was informed that, no, the massage is not at a place next door to the prison, but actually inside it.

There was a security check and then I walked over to a waving Benjamin, hailing me to a tree on the field where he was.

I later found out it was an “open prison” for lower grade criminals which meant prisoners were free to roam around the grounds.

After greeting Benjamin I was in the slightly odd position of just a few minutes later being in only my boxers under a tree with a gruff prison guard digging in his elbow all up my inner thigh.

Being an open prison meant the inmates are free to come over and say hello, and the sight of their guard on top of a white guy writhing in pain (it was a “deep tissue” massage: light-years away from the semblance of relaxation) was all quite amusing.

One chap popped over and had a quite casual conversation with Benjamin about the football, disturbed only by the occasional yelp from my contorted self in agony beneath Benjamin’s weight. 

When it was over (2h 45m later) I hobbled back to the gate and was sore for the next three days.

Anyway, the reason this was initially interesting was the unusual combo of prison guard and masseuse.

Other favourites include:

If you know of any other good combos, I’d be interested to hear them!


In other news…

I found this video very pleasant:

Everest – A Time Lapse Film – II from Elia Saikaly on Vimeo.

If you’re interested in reading about man’s relationship/ fascination with mountains, I can highly recommend Mountains of the Mind, by Robert MacFarlane.


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